My Colleague is finally a history in the office. A 'lil bit of sadness but ah well, I know I can easily forget about her. Not to mention its not like I won't see her again^^ "Everything Happens for a Reason" huh! Yes I always believe.
Today I have taken a few pictures with her. Many times in life, part is actually beautiful and funny. Try to look back how we met, how she treated (falsely) me, how she sabotaged me, how she talked to me, betrayed my trust and so and so many others. I think I have tonnes of memories with her. Oppsss! No false thinking please, this is PURELY friendship. And whats funny is that, she is never a good person in the office environment, but is a good friend, well FUN! Haha.
All the best to you, heartily and truly.
原来世界上真的没有永远的敌人，想当初我是多么的讨厌她，但今日，她的离开竟还牵起我一点点的落寞跟不舍（不多啦~）。想到这里就感觉到，原来人生还挺奇妙、满美好的！
Z啊，你是怎么看你的人生的呢？好想听听你对生命的憧憬、对生命的感想。
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
30 JUL, WED, 8:58PM
I bought 4 pieces of movie today,
1. Wanted
2. Batman Begins, as I have just watched "The Dark Knight", I want to get refreshed a bit.
3. A Thailand Ghost Story, OMG~
4. A Fighting Movie, Western..
I have bought a lot of movies since I came here, but not all I have watched. I think its just an interest to collect thing.. like when I bought a RM800 PSP....
Today, though it is a holiday, I spent the whole day in the office. I played a match of lost Dota, and chatted for whole day. I am very bad ler hehe..
Well I have to go back as there is a colleague waiting for me still. I shall continue tomorrow. I hope everything would be fine tomorrow.
1. Wanted
2. Batman Begins, as I have just watched "The Dark Knight", I want to get refreshed a bit.
3. A Thailand Ghost Story, OMG~
4. A Fighting Movie, Western..
I have bought a lot of movies since I came here, but not all I have watched. I think its just an interest to collect thing.. like when I bought a RM800 PSP....
Today, though it is a holiday, I spent the whole day in the office. I played a match of lost Dota, and chatted for whole day. I am very bad ler hehe..
Well I have to go back as there is a colleague waiting for me still. I shall continue tomorrow. I hope everything would be fine tomorrow.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
29 JUL, TUE, 6:52PM
有点好奇,怎么每天都感觉这么累的呢?也有点要吐的感觉,可能是中午吃的午餐的关系吧……
其实最近都有点兴奋去写部落格，因为都会有很多不同名字的朋友为我留言，写起来也逐渐变得又交流的性质。而关于今天，也和往常没什么差，还是头疼了。我的同事就快走人了，明天是当地的假期，也就是说后天就是她的最后一天，当然，会有淀依依不舍的感觉，纵使我在她面前带着的面具从来不曾拆下，而她也从来不知道其实我讲了她不少坏话（她讲我更多顺便说一声）。
她是个怎样的女人吗？我要以最短且最充分的文字形容她：
可以做好朋友绝对不能做同事
完全不能守秘密（包括自己的秘密）
霸道淘气蛮不讲理但带有点可爱
把自己的缺点讲成别人的缺点
没有羞耻心没有道德但表现得很体面
讲真的一句，整个公司的人都怕了她，都带着面具跟她做朋友，但她从来没察觉，我觉得她真的很可怜，不这么认为吗？
如今她即将走人，老实说一句，我很期待没她的日子，可是人总会担心改变。
没她的日子会有所不同吗？一切的次序会改变吗？哈……我被她影响也还蛮多的呢。
其实最近都有点兴奋去写部落格，因为都会有很多不同名字的朋友为我留言，写起来也逐渐变得又交流的性质。而关于今天，也和往常没什么差，还是头疼了。我的同事就快走人了，明天是当地的假期，也就是说后天就是她的最后一天，当然，会有淀依依不舍的感觉，纵使我在她面前带着的面具从来不曾拆下，而她也从来不知道其实我讲了她不少坏话（她讲我更多顺便说一声）。
她是个怎样的女人吗？我要以最短且最充分的文字形容她：
可以做好朋友绝对不能做同事
完全不能守秘密（包括自己的秘密）
霸道淘气蛮不讲理但带有点可爱
把自己的缺点讲成别人的缺点
没有羞耻心没有道德但表现得很体面
讲真的一句，整个公司的人都怕了她，都带着面具跟她做朋友，但她从来没察觉，我觉得她真的很可怜，不这么认为吗？
如今她即将走人，老实说一句，我很期待没她的日子，可是人总会担心改变。
没她的日子会有所不同吗？一切的次序会改变吗？哈……我被她影响也还蛮多的呢。
Monday, July 28, 2008
一段感情，不论是友情爱情亲情，如果存在着不信任和不坦诚，这段情将会有终结的一天
I accidentally bumped into one of the articles from the net. This was told by a man, who fell to the very ground, clutching his shaky fists, pushing so hard to stand up. And eventually... Well I know not what is happening on him yet, because it seems to me that, the story is not an end. Do read it, if you can read chinese.
感情是有一个期限的。
每段感情，都是必须用心栽培，用心灌溉的，因为感情这一回事，不是升温，就是降温，你相信吗？
其实跟你相处的日子,是我这一生中最快乐的时刻，而你也曾经一时让我觉得我们彼此当对方为最好的朋友。
感情，不论是友情亲情爱情，都会有磨擦。我不知道你到底有没有察觉，其实我们相处中，真的有很多的磨擦。当然，现在想想，这可能真的是我多心而造成的吧。
和你的交情，曾经是我最重视的一段情，不论我们的交情带有怎样的元素，我依然非常珍惜。
我曾经为了这段交情讨好你，拉进彼此的关系，因为我深信一段坚毅的友情是需要双方的努力的，也许我太贪心了吧，也许我多心了，也许是我一厢情愿，也许是我注入了不必要的感情元素，也许我真的是这段感情失败的原因。
也没问题啦。今天，我们做不了好朋友，做普通的活动友也还不差吧:)
还记得，当初的我们是多么的无所不聊，我们一见面就是说不完的话题，听不尽的欢笑。如今啊，我们已没有以往的默契了，我看到你，也有了尴尬的感觉，因为我已经不知道我该以什么样的表情面对你。纵使你笑颜面对我，最多，我也只能回你一个腼腆的笑容。很深切的体会到，原来失去的默契就是这么一回事。
那一天当我们与彼此再不讲话的时候，其实我已预感到，也许那就是我们的最后一天。讲真的，我非常地伤心，我非常地在意，每天的5个小时空当时间，我都用来想我们之间的点点滴滴，我。。想跟人家讲却欲言又止，因为这毕竟不是件容易开得了口的话题。
好沮丧的日子里，我过着行尸走肉的生活，我变得不爱跟人家讲话，其余的时间都是看着无聊的电脑荧幕，有时听听歌，有时找找你的资料，绝大部分我都用来想我们之间的事，等待着不可能捎来的讯息，我。。每天开始写起了部落格，但怎么写都是悲观的文字，有时想到感触时，也哭不出来，更没有任何人跟我谈心事。渐渐地，我开始放弃这段感情了，原因不外是我已经绝望了。
有时我会想，你可曾经当过我是你的“最好的朋友”吗？或者是“好朋友”，还是只是“普通朋友”？我完全不清楚自己在你的心里的位置，这也可能是我对这段感情绝望的原因吧。但我今天可以跟你讲，那些日子，我一直都把你当成我生命中“唯一最好的朋友”，也许你已忘记了吧，我还曾经告诉过你。
今天，我也要很诚实，以及很冒昧地跟你讲一句，今天的你已不是我曾经最珍惜的朋友了。
对不起。。我们仍然是朋友，只是今天的我们少了那么“一点点”的默契、“一点点”的幽默、“一点点”的珍惜。
我觉得，我们可能再没有机会作好朋友了吧，因为今天的我在你面前，已经毫无尊严，可能你也不会清楚为什么我会没尊严，也许是我太敏感。
不管如何，这一切还是得看缘份。有缘无份或无缘有份，都不可能把我们的距离拉进的，随缘吧:)
以便我们以后再没有这样的机会讲这些话题，我给你一个忠告：“一段感情，不论是友情爱情亲情，如果存在着不信任和不坦诚，这段情将会有终结的一天。”
衷心的祝福你。
感情是有一个期限的。
每段感情，都是必须用心栽培，用心灌溉的，因为感情这一回事，不是升温，就是降温，你相信吗？
其实跟你相处的日子,是我这一生中最快乐的时刻，而你也曾经一时让我觉得我们彼此当对方为最好的朋友。
感情，不论是友情亲情爱情，都会有磨擦。我不知道你到底有没有察觉，其实我们相处中，真的有很多的磨擦。当然，现在想想，这可能真的是我多心而造成的吧。
和你的交情，曾经是我最重视的一段情，不论我们的交情带有怎样的元素，我依然非常珍惜。
我曾经为了这段交情讨好你，拉进彼此的关系，因为我深信一段坚毅的友情是需要双方的努力的，也许我太贪心了吧，也许我多心了，也许是我一厢情愿，也许是我注入了不必要的感情元素，也许我真的是这段感情失败的原因。
也没问题啦。今天，我们做不了好朋友，做普通的活动友也还不差吧:)
还记得，当初的我们是多么的无所不聊，我们一见面就是说不完的话题，听不尽的欢笑。如今啊，我们已没有以往的默契了，我看到你，也有了尴尬的感觉，因为我已经不知道我该以什么样的表情面对你。纵使你笑颜面对我，最多，我也只能回你一个腼腆的笑容。很深切的体会到，原来失去的默契就是这么一回事。
那一天当我们与彼此再不讲话的时候，其实我已预感到，也许那就是我们的最后一天。讲真的，我非常地伤心，我非常地在意，每天的5个小时空当时间，我都用来想我们之间的点点滴滴，我。。想跟人家讲却欲言又止，因为这毕竟不是件容易开得了口的话题。
好沮丧的日子里，我过着行尸走肉的生活，我变得不爱跟人家讲话，其余的时间都是看着无聊的电脑荧幕，有时听听歌，有时找找你的资料，绝大部分我都用来想我们之间的事，等待着不可能捎来的讯息，我。。每天开始写起了部落格，但怎么写都是悲观的文字，有时想到感触时，也哭不出来，更没有任何人跟我谈心事。渐渐地，我开始放弃这段感情了，原因不外是我已经绝望了。
有时我会想，你可曾经当过我是你的“最好的朋友”吗？或者是“好朋友”，还是只是“普通朋友”？我完全不清楚自己在你的心里的位置，这也可能是我对这段感情绝望的原因吧。但我今天可以跟你讲，那些日子，我一直都把你当成我生命中“唯一最好的朋友”，也许你已忘记了吧，我还曾经告诉过你。
今天，我也要很诚实，以及很冒昧地跟你讲一句，今天的你已不是我曾经最珍惜的朋友了。
对不起。。我们仍然是朋友，只是今天的我们少了那么“一点点”的默契、“一点点”的幽默、“一点点”的珍惜。
我觉得，我们可能再没有机会作好朋友了吧，因为今天的我在你面前，已经毫无尊严，可能你也不会清楚为什么我会没尊严，也许是我太敏感。
不管如何，这一切还是得看缘份。有缘无份或无缘有份，都不可能把我们的距离拉进的，随缘吧:)
以便我们以后再没有这样的机会讲这些话题，我给你一个忠告：“一段感情，不论是友情爱情亲情，如果存在着不信任和不坦诚，这段情将会有终结的一天。”
衷心的祝福你。
28 JUL, MON, 6:20PM
今天又头痛了整天。
刚刚下午跟Z聊了一会，他给了我一段我之前讲过的话，讲真的，我完全无头绪我当初想着什么东西。由于很好奇，我回到了那个帖读了一读，还是没头绪，发觉原来，人类是很善变的生命体呢。
除了读那一个帖外，我也读了些其他的，愕然发现我还曾经有这样与那样的想法，先期来还真的很有趣儿，另外也觉得莫名的感动。
原来我曾经是那样的人，我。。有变吗？
很不想承认自己改变过因为我一直以来都把持着“我的思想由始至终都不会改变“的观念，但事实证明了“这是错误的”。
今年我25啦，明年26，10年后的今天我又会怎么想人生，20年后呢？
我栽在自己思想，不明白，“为什么“在我的生命中会那么频率地出现。
刚刚下午跟Z聊了一会，他给了我一段我之前讲过的话，讲真的，我完全无头绪我当初想着什么东西。由于很好奇，我回到了那个帖读了一读，还是没头绪，发觉原来，人类是很善变的生命体呢。
除了读那一个帖外，我也读了些其他的，愕然发现我还曾经有这样与那样的想法，先期来还真的很有趣儿，另外也觉得莫名的感动。
原来我曾经是那样的人，我。。有变吗？
很不想承认自己改变过因为我一直以来都把持着“我的思想由始至终都不会改变“的观念，但事实证明了“这是错误的”。
今年我25啦，明年26，10年后的今天我又会怎么想人生，20年后呢？
我栽在自己思想，不明白，“为什么“在我的生命中会那么频率地出现。
Sunday, July 27, 2008
27 JUL, SUN, 2:24AM
Went to a movie at 9 just now. The Dark Knight. What to say about this movie hmm~~ A 100% from me^^ I mean it. I don't know how you would see it to be, for me it is invincible!
After the movie K and I went to drink. We had a 2 hours chat. So lot of things we chat on, and I also gained a lot from the chat. I hope those would be important stuff for my growth in the future. I started to realise something too, but I cannot put them in words yet. Maybe Some other time huh?
I drank like 2 can of beer just now, still feeling a bit dizzy now. Well its good for sleep in fact. Till then, I will drop something in my blog again about what I have gained today.
Jaa Mata!
After the movie K and I went to drink. We had a 2 hours chat. So lot of things we chat on, and I also gained a lot from the chat. I hope those would be important stuff for my growth in the future. I started to realise something too, but I cannot put them in words yet. Maybe Some other time huh?
I drank like 2 can of beer just now, still feeling a bit dizzy now. Well its good for sleep in fact. Till then, I will drop something in my blog again about what I have gained today.
Jaa Mata!
Saturday, July 26, 2008
26 JUL, SAT, 9:46AM
Last night wasn't able to write anything as my sister was using my laptop and didn't wanna go away.. Once in a while still ok. I was also tired yesterday truly, after driving for 2 and a half hours back.
Lately I am a bit frustrated. The reasons are the happenings in the office, which I was very not happy about. Somehow I notice pushing responsibility is everybody's nature, including me. But well of course, if you are able to push it my way, please do so.
Been working here for half a year, exactly half a year! Closed one sales and then the next is coming, did anyone ever appreciate that? Sucks. Well I don't need your appreciation, but at least for certain deal, please don't snatch the credit away from me, which I will feel very disappointed.
These days have been unhappy. But well, things happened for good, eventually the seminar my stupid colleague was trying to organise was lastly not a success (As if I want this seminar.. NO WAY! I hate this kinda thing as it will bring you troubles only!) Whilst, what have I achieved in real life, in my world of feeling hmm..
Failure failure.
Too negative me my friend. Sorry, if you don't feel like reading it there is no problem. This is one only way that I release my pressure, by being rude and frank and naked.
Jaa, mata!
Lately I am a bit frustrated. The reasons are the happenings in the office, which I was very not happy about. Somehow I notice pushing responsibility is everybody's nature, including me. But well of course, if you are able to push it my way, please do so.
Been working here for half a year, exactly half a year! Closed one sales and then the next is coming, did anyone ever appreciate that? Sucks. Well I don't need your appreciation, but at least for certain deal, please don't snatch the credit away from me, which I will feel very disappointed.
These days have been unhappy. But well, things happened for good, eventually the seminar my stupid colleague was trying to organise was lastly not a success (As if I want this seminar.. NO WAY! I hate this kinda thing as it will bring you troubles only!) Whilst, what have I achieved in real life, in my world of feeling hmm..
Failure failure.
Too negative me my friend. Sorry, if you don't feel like reading it there is no problem. This is one only way that I release my pressure, by being rude and frank and naked.
Jaa, mata!
Thursday, July 24, 2008
24 JUL, THU, 6:34PM
my headache strikes again, not to mention when the next door turn on the music like crazy OMG! It hurts.. What to do now?
Today I am feeling a bit lost, lost in a sense that, I don't have any idea what to write. I just know that I am very tired in the eyes, pain in the head and dry in the mouth.
Perhaps I have to sum up the things I have done today at least.
In the morning, after preparing some contact list to my colleague, I went out to deliver invitation letter. It is about next Tuesday's seminar on the Educational Management System. For me, this seminar is a total bullshit.
At noon, we had lunch at the next door Chinese Restaurant. I ordered砂锅面which cost me around 4 Dollar and just now (5 minutes ago) I spent another 4 Dollar 50 cent for dinner:( Awww... That makes 8 Dollar 50 cent and it exceeds my budget of the day.
Well talking back to what had happened today, in the afternoon I went to see a client nearby and it will be a promising deal, though of course, it wouldn't be closed that fast.
Ah... finally talking with L:)
I have to go already see ya.
Today I am feeling a bit lost, lost in a sense that, I don't have any idea what to write. I just know that I am very tired in the eyes, pain in the head and dry in the mouth.
Perhaps I have to sum up the things I have done today at least.
In the morning, after preparing some contact list to my colleague, I went out to deliver invitation letter. It is about next Tuesday's seminar on the Educational Management System. For me, this seminar is a total bullshit.
At noon, we had lunch at the next door Chinese Restaurant. I ordered砂锅面which cost me around 4 Dollar and just now (5 minutes ago) I spent another 4 Dollar 50 cent for dinner:( Awww... That makes 8 Dollar 50 cent and it exceeds my budget of the day.
Well talking back to what had happened today, in the afternoon I went to see a client nearby and it will be a promising deal, though of course, it wouldn't be closed that fast.
Ah... finally talking with L:)
I have to go already see ya.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
23 JUL, WED, 9:03PM
I am having headache these few days... My vision now is, blur and teary. My face is burning hot now and my head feels like somebody pressing onto it, pulse by pulse.. This has been many days.. I think it is because I work too much with computer, staring too much to the screen (though it is a LCD).
Just had Baby Kailan Beancurd Rice, which was nice and cost me 4 Dollar 50 cent. Today's dinner I was not alone, I have a colleague together with me. He will be here till this Friday. Well, I don't really like people to come here as I will have to sacrifice a lot of thing, utmost all is my sleep. But **sigh** no choice when you are a staff.
Advice of the day, "Don't be a staff"
I still have no idea what time would I stay in the office till, my colleague is still doing some of the job. Hopefully not too late as, later midnight at 12, I have to actually fetch him out to meet girl:( **cheh** Then? Haha.. Which mean tomorrow I will have story to listen^^
It is 9:11PM and I am still missing someone.. I guess it is over as that is what your PM is for today?
Ja.. Mata.
Just had Baby Kailan Beancurd Rice, which was nice and cost me 4 Dollar 50 cent. Today's dinner I was not alone, I have a colleague together with me. He will be here till this Friday. Well, I don't really like people to come here as I will have to sacrifice a lot of thing, utmost all is my sleep. But **sigh** no choice when you are a staff.
Advice of the day, "Don't be a staff"
I still have no idea what time would I stay in the office till, my colleague is still doing some of the job. Hopefully not too late as, later midnight at 12, I have to actually fetch him out to meet girl:( **cheh** Then? Haha.. Which mean tomorrow I will have story to listen^^
It is 9:11PM and I am still missing someone.. I guess it is over as that is what your PM is for today?
Ja.. Mata.
23 JUL, WED, 6:40PM
"I can't help but keep staring into the sky, because I have lost my guts."
*sigh*
These days I really have to thank several persons, which appear in my life without any further notice.
Firstly, it would be L. Though, we are no longer contacting with each other, but, thanks, for giving me some of the sweet memories L^^ I really appreciate it so much, though we might not even have the chance to meet up again:)
Secondly, its Z. Thank you for everything you have spared to me. Thanks for listening to me, thanks for giving me the opportunity to go out with you. Thanks for accepting me as who I am haha XD It's really good to have a friend like you in my life. First!
Thirdly, I have to thank my good buddy Alan, who is the most caring friend I have in life. This is a role model of a good friend, definitely. When you are down, he would never leave you. He might not even know the reason, but he is always there to accompany you watching dull movies, playing boring games and spending meaningless nights. You are always a friend I would sacrifice my own self for ^^
Fourthly, it would be B. B, thanks for everything-- laughter, sadness, madness and all others. You are one of the most important passer-by in my life. Hopefully with your shadow, I can grow.
Mom and dad, sisters and brothers, you are my treasure of life. I would give my life for you all, because I know that I am most blessed in the world because of you.
Ending today's gratitude with a smile. Don't worry, though I sound so but its not like I am going to kill myself foolish. I don't suicide ok!
*sigh*
These days I really have to thank several persons, which appear in my life without any further notice.
Firstly, it would be L. Though, we are no longer contacting with each other, but, thanks, for giving me some of the sweet memories L^^ I really appreciate it so much, though we might not even have the chance to meet up again:)
Secondly, its Z. Thank you for everything you have spared to me. Thanks for listening to me, thanks for giving me the opportunity to go out with you. Thanks for accepting me as who I am haha XD It's really good to have a friend like you in my life. First!
Thirdly, I have to thank my good buddy Alan, who is the most caring friend I have in life. This is a role model of a good friend, definitely. When you are down, he would never leave you. He might not even know the reason, but he is always there to accompany you watching dull movies, playing boring games and spending meaningless nights. You are always a friend I would sacrifice my own self for ^^
Fourthly, it would be B. B, thanks for everything-- laughter, sadness, madness and all others. You are one of the most important passer-by in my life. Hopefully with your shadow, I can grow.
Mom and dad, sisters and brothers, you are my treasure of life. I would give my life for you all, because I know that I am most blessed in the world because of you.
Ending today's gratitude with a smile. Don't worry, though I sound so but its not like I am going to kill myself foolish. I don't suicide ok!
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
22 JUL,TUE, 7:42PM
How do you see me?
Just now after work, and after everyone left the office, my colleague Cheng was left with me. All of a sudden he threw me a question,
"Do you still in contact with Chua?"
Well, Chua WAS one of the senior developer here. She joined for 3-4 months and then left. The reason? Well then, listen to the story.
Talking about her will make me very fuss, because frankly speaking, this is one very very irritating and my so-called "bad" person I have ever met. She came in and worked after 1 month I joined this company. We both are (she WAS) coming from the same hometown and work in foreign land together. Well, I am the kinda person who, will always try to make friend with people. Maybe people will call me flirty and sarcastic, but this is me! I do love to make people happy.
Of course towards her, I am like treating others, I smiled to her, I exposed myself "nakedly" to her (meaning to say that I was not forming myself a barrier when I was together with her). I never tend to be cautious when I deal with defenseless people (and this is what I thought), because she is the weak type of people, and she doesn't look at all beautiful. I confess! I treated her very nice!!
But less than I know that, she is actually a very repulsive and defensive type of person. Of course, I try to understand people-- your career, your family, your interest and so. I don't know how many times I had been thrown the same reply (which I initially thought she was just kidding),
"Hey, apparently we are not that close okay."
Throughout the months I had been with her, I had heard this endless times. Well NO PROBLEM!! I know she might be the repulsive type so I just let her be as she was comfortable with.
Another scenario, I joked. I joke to everybody and I joked to her of course. There was once I said,
"Chua is a very experienced programmer." which I truly meant it. She just threw me a line,
"Don't try to sabotage me."
Well again, when Chua was not even here yet, I used to stay in the office till late night to surf. When Chua was here, I had to consider her situation. So normally after around 5:30 or 6, I would initiate her with,
"Chua, wait me for another 10 minutes can?"
Her reply,
"Can you please stop using such excuses to sound like it is ME, who is actually the reason that you have to go back okay!"
Fine!!! I never said it EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!
Another time, when I went out for prospects, and only returned to office at around 6:30PM, after entering the office, "someone"'s face was SO black!! And i ignored, as we were not in a good term anymore. When the 3rd person (aside of us) went out to take a cigarette, this was what she said,
"MY STOMACH IS HURTING LIKE HELL (BECAUSE OF YOU, definitely she meant this, because this line was shot at me!)"
And I just told her, i didn't bring out the key, it was always on my table.
"How should I know that?"
HAHAHAHA!! Good development!! I raised my voice and we started to argue for like few lines, then she kept quiet. Of course, I was a victor in the argument. Who does she think she is to be in position to quarrel with me? I don't quarrel easily with people, but when I have my point, you can never win me.
*sigh*
Pathetic woman. I tell you, from the day you started to show me rudeness, I had never respected you, for whatever reason, or whatever skills you are holding. You are nothing for me but a pathetic soul I met in my journey of life!! GO ON!! Go and lead your life the way you want, I can only tell you one thing,
"Being not beautiful is the wrong of no one, and I won't give a damn insult to you, BUT to be UGLY in your heart, you could NEVER get my respect!"
So Cheng, do you still doubt why I "dislike" her that much? Imagine if you WERE me!! Where would you stand? How would you feel? What will you do!
Really angry when, someone blows the red charcoal... -.-"
Just now after work, and after everyone left the office, my colleague Cheng was left with me. All of a sudden he threw me a question,
"Do you still in contact with Chua?"
Well, Chua WAS one of the senior developer here. She joined for 3-4 months and then left. The reason? Well then, listen to the story.
Talking about her will make me very fuss, because frankly speaking, this is one very very irritating and my so-called "bad" person I have ever met. She came in and worked after 1 month I joined this company. We both are (she WAS) coming from the same hometown and work in foreign land together. Well, I am the kinda person who, will always try to make friend with people. Maybe people will call me flirty and sarcastic, but this is me! I do love to make people happy.
Of course towards her, I am like treating others, I smiled to her, I exposed myself "nakedly" to her (meaning to say that I was not forming myself a barrier when I was together with her). I never tend to be cautious when I deal with defenseless people (and this is what I thought), because she is the weak type of people, and she doesn't look at all beautiful. I confess! I treated her very nice!!
But less than I know that, she is actually a very repulsive and defensive type of person. Of course, I try to understand people-- your career, your family, your interest and so. I don't know how many times I had been thrown the same reply (which I initially thought she was just kidding),
"Hey, apparently we are not that close okay."
Throughout the months I had been with her, I had heard this endless times. Well NO PROBLEM!! I know she might be the repulsive type so I just let her be as she was comfortable with.
Another scenario, I joked. I joke to everybody and I joked to her of course. There was once I said,
"Chua is a very experienced programmer." which I truly meant it. She just threw me a line,
"Don't try to sabotage me."
Well again, when Chua was not even here yet, I used to stay in the office till late night to surf. When Chua was here, I had to consider her situation. So normally after around 5:30 or 6, I would initiate her with,
"Chua, wait me for another 10 minutes can?"
Her reply,
"Can you please stop using such excuses to sound like it is ME, who is actually the reason that you have to go back okay!"
Fine!!! I never said it EVER AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!
Another time, when I went out for prospects, and only returned to office at around 6:30PM, after entering the office, "someone"'s face was SO black!! And i ignored, as we were not in a good term anymore. When the 3rd person (aside of us) went out to take a cigarette, this was what she said,
"MY STOMACH IS HURTING LIKE HELL (BECAUSE OF YOU, definitely she meant this, because this line was shot at me!)"
And I just told her, i didn't bring out the key, it was always on my table.
"How should I know that?"
HAHAHAHA!! Good development!! I raised my voice and we started to argue for like few lines, then she kept quiet. Of course, I was a victor in the argument. Who does she think she is to be in position to quarrel with me? I don't quarrel easily with people, but when I have my point, you can never win me.
*sigh*
Pathetic woman. I tell you, from the day you started to show me rudeness, I had never respected you, for whatever reason, or whatever skills you are holding. You are nothing for me but a pathetic soul I met in my journey of life!! GO ON!! Go and lead your life the way you want, I can only tell you one thing,
"Being not beautiful is the wrong of no one, and I won't give a damn insult to you, BUT to be UGLY in your heart, you could NEVER get my respect!"
So Cheng, do you still doubt why I "dislike" her that much? Imagine if you WERE me!! Where would you stand? How would you feel? What will you do!
Really angry when, someone blows the red charcoal... -.-"
Monday, July 21, 2008
21 JUL, MON, 7:51PM
Another week in foreign land. I guess I have started to accept the fact that, I might be leading such life for quite some time. Actually I don't mind to be here all by myself.. as long as I am getting a 'lil bit of care from.. Well somebody.
Have been busy for a whole day, but nothing I got in return. Later I might need to visit the nearby supermarket to buy some grocery for the household. I wonder which supermarket to go.
I am going to turn 25 in 22 days, and I am still "zero" in a lot of thing.
Money saving- zero
Love- zero
Travel- zero
Success- zero
All "zeros"... Which give you a lot of pressure. Mom is starting to urge me to nail gf, and of course, I am so reluctant to follow what she says. Why should I follow your order beloved mom.
I have nothing to leave for today. I feel that everyday after working hours, I would be very negative, very pessimistic. For people I am an optimist while deep inside me, only I know myself.
Who is going to offer the help to understand me? I don't understand what I want in life.
Have been busy for a whole day, but nothing I got in return. Later I might need to visit the nearby supermarket to buy some grocery for the household. I wonder which supermarket to go.
I am going to turn 25 in 22 days, and I am still "zero" in a lot of thing.
Money saving- zero
Love- zero
Travel- zero
Success- zero
All "zeros"... Which give you a lot of pressure. Mom is starting to urge me to nail gf, and of course, I am so reluctant to follow what she says. Why should I follow your order beloved mom.
I have nothing to leave for today. I feel that everyday after working hours, I would be very negative, very pessimistic. For people I am an optimist while deep inside me, only I know myself.
Who is going to offer the help to understand me? I don't understand what I want in life.
Sunday, July 20, 2008
20 JUL, SUN, 5:17PM
真地感到很失魂落魄，没什么干劲，是为了什么事，也只有自己最清楚。
为什么我非得承受这一切呢？我知道！如果不放手这一段情，很难可以接受另一段，可是方法我可是了不少种类，可是……
刚刚根一位好友聚会，打了3到4个小时的游戏，得来的？空空如也。我也不知道是为了什么而答应赴约会去了，也许是不想看着电脑荧幕等待着某人吧。
已经烦恼了整整一年了，我想，是不是已该是时候来个彻彻底底的了断呢？
凡人毕竟得承受烦恼，但偏爱犯践。
为什么我非得承受这一切呢？我知道！如果不放手这一段情，很难可以接受另一段，可是方法我可是了不少种类，可是……
刚刚根一位好友聚会，打了3到4个小时的游戏，得来的？空空如也。我也不知道是为了什么而答应赴约会去了，也许是不想看着电脑荧幕等待着某人吧。
已经烦恼了整整一年了，我想，是不是已该是时候来个彻彻底底的了断呢？
凡人毕竟得承受烦恼，但偏爱犯践。
Saturday, July 19, 2008
19 JUL, SAT, 5:47PM
This morning I woke up at 8, after bathing and preparing for about half and hour, I went out with my family for breakfast. Then later I stayed in the office till 1PM, skipping the lunch due to the late breakfast.
But of course, something happened today, which I did not expect it to come. I am being asked to go for badminton.. And of course, I conformed with it. I am a bit worried.. for some reasons **sigh**
Whether it is a good thing to happen or reversely, I will see the development tonight. I will meet up with Z after the badminton I hope. And I also hope that I won't stay till too late as my sister just came back from KL tonight^^ No idea if you will read this part in time though **hehe**
Just went to fetch my sister from the airport, she is as beautiful as ever and very nice still **sweet** I still remember that she told me she loves me the most among all the siblings.. Its nostalgic because, I think I am no longer her favourite. No problem lar, I wish her all the best, shes still my beloved sister.
But of course, something happened today, which I did not expect it to come. I am being asked to go for badminton.. And of course, I conformed with it. I am a bit worried.. for some reasons **sigh**
Whether it is a good thing to happen or reversely, I will see the development tonight. I will meet up with Z after the badminton I hope. And I also hope that I won't stay till too late as my sister just came back from KL tonight^^ No idea if you will read this part in time though **hehe**
Just went to fetch my sister from the airport, she is as beautiful as ever and very nice still **sweet** I still remember that she told me she loves me the most among all the siblings.. Its nostalgic because, I think I am no longer her favourite. No problem lar, I wish her all the best, shes still my beloved sister.
19 JUL, SAT, 12:39AM
Today I know you are not around, and that's why I switched on the computer earlier than I used to be. I don't want you to notice my signing on to MSN, because I don't want to have a awkward situation, because I know, it is awkward for both of us, even to see each other online.
Today I worked whole day, just for one proposal. After finished working at 5:30, I had a match of Dota with friend, before I started to depart to Miri at 6:40. And I reached Miri at 8:30. Stopping by around Pelita Commercial Centre, took a cigarette and then quietly drove home. And this is my day. Ha..
Well then, what else to be expected Hmmmmm~~~ thinking..
Today I worked whole day, just for one proposal. After finished working at 5:30, I had a match of Dota with friend, before I started to depart to Miri at 6:40. And I reached Miri at 8:30. Stopping by around Pelita Commercial Centre, took a cigarette and then quietly drove home. And this is my day. Ha..
Well then, what else to be expected Hmmmmm~~~ thinking..
Thursday, July 17, 2008
17 JUL, THU, 9:42PM
Today is a memorable day to jot down some events in my life:)
Yes of course it is a good news! I got a sales yayyyy!!!!!!!! Hehe:) Feel so good this afternoon. But anyway the Purchase Order is not yet received, so there might still be changes. Hopefully won't, of course:)
But after the meeting with customers, it is one of the most headache day for me. I have to spend like 2 hours? I guess, to amend the proposal. Here and there, it might seem simple but you would never know all these small little tiny things have taken me how much time and dying-cells... **sigh** but still **happy**
HAHA..
Well then, I have to put a full stop here. I have been working for the whole day, driving like crazy to the so-far-away customer's premise just for a one and a fifteen minutes talk but well, I am still very excited... But coming to calculate the commission, lol, well its quite a lot!!! Approximately 250 Dollar for a 50k deal XD
What do you say about it??
Till then, jaa mata!!
Yes of course it is a good news! I got a sales yayyyy!!!!!!!! Hehe:) Feel so good this afternoon. But anyway the Purchase Order is not yet received, so there might still be changes. Hopefully won't, of course:)
But after the meeting with customers, it is one of the most headache day for me. I have to spend like 2 hours? I guess, to amend the proposal. Here and there, it might seem simple but you would never know all these small little tiny things have taken me how much time and dying-cells... **sigh** but still **happy**
HAHA..
Well then, I have to put a full stop here. I have been working for the whole day, driving like crazy to the so-far-away customer's premise just for a one and a fifteen minutes talk but well, I am still very excited... But coming to calculate the commission, lol, well its quite a lot!!! Approximately 250 Dollar for a 50k deal XD
What do you say about it??
Till then, jaa mata!!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
16 JUL, WED, 9:19PM
Life is like this all the time.
Working--Lunch--Working--Dinner--Internet
**Sigh**... Nothing new one?
Getting a bit sleepy already. Tomorrow I have several appointments to go for. Especially I will have to travel to BMC in the after by 3, which is 60KM from my office God Dammit!!
**Sigh**
Nothing is left after today. Later have to recharge battery after reaching home haha..
What is to be expected this weekend ler... I am wondering. L is gone T.T
Jaa, mata!
Working--Lunch--Working--Dinner--Internet
**Sigh**... Nothing new one?
Getting a bit sleepy already. Tomorrow I have several appointments to go for. Especially I will have to travel to BMC in the after by 3, which is 60KM from my office God Dammit!!
**Sigh**
Nothing is left after today. Later have to recharge battery after reaching home haha..
What is to be expected this weekend ler... I am wondering. L is gone T.T
Jaa, mata!
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
15 JUL, TUE, 3:23PM
"Easy is to Judge the Mistakes of Others, Difficult is to Recognize Our Own Mistakes"
"Changing the Face Can Change Nothing, But Facing the Change Can Change Everything"
"Changing the Face Can Change Nothing, But Facing the Change Can Change Everything"
15 JUL, TUE, 11:34AM
今天我身在家乡,明天的我身在何方?
Today is the National Public Holiday of the foreign land I am working in. And so I have the chance to stay in mom's office, sitting on the floor now, putting the laptop on a small table, and write my stuff. Just that there isn't any coffee accompanies me hehe. Well, I like alcoholic drinks more these days anesthetization and yea.. to confess, I also start to adopt breathing fresh air habit lol:)
Oppss! Yesterday I met with my buddy A. We went for fast-food dinner at K*C and catched Hancock. Just only then I learn what is the meaning of John Hancock.. Boringnya~ And after the movie session we went to nearby CC and played several matches of noob game, which I was very fuss about! Leaver or Noob, which one you choose?
Coincidentally, I met Z-- Yea the newly-made friend. A thinker right hahahahaha... We had tea break together and then talked like almost 40-50 minutes inside the car. Just to let you know that, this problem has always been my problem, but I was never able to speak it out to anyone. And now I can but uh.. this is a weird conversation, somehow for me:) Maybe I can't get used to it yet.
Tonight I will have to leave to foreign land again, a 2-hour drive, which I dread the most.. Some buildings, scenery and route. God dammit scientist-tachi!! Go and create somekind of portal lar. *Shitting again..* Normally I don't say this in front of myself hehe but now that I have a reader.. Its a bit weird on how I should retain my normal self when write.
I am lost(in term of battle) and lost(in term of direction)..Dual-Lost.
Jaa ne
Today is the National Public Holiday of the foreign land I am working in. And so I have the chance to stay in mom's office, sitting on the floor now, putting the laptop on a small table, and write my stuff. Just that there isn't any coffee accompanies me hehe. Well, I like alcoholic drinks more these days anesthetization and yea.. to confess, I also start to adopt breathing fresh air habit lol:)
Oppss! Yesterday I met with my buddy A. We went for fast-food dinner at K*C and catched Hancock. Just only then I learn what is the meaning of John Hancock.. Boringnya~ And after the movie session we went to nearby CC and played several matches of noob game, which I was very fuss about! Leaver or Noob, which one you choose?
Coincidentally, I met Z-- Yea the newly-made friend. A thinker right hahahahaha... We had tea break together and then talked like almost 40-50 minutes inside the car. Just to let you know that, this problem has always been my problem, but I was never able to speak it out to anyone. And now I can but uh.. this is a weird conversation, somehow for me:) Maybe I can't get used to it yet.
Tonight I will have to leave to foreign land again, a 2-hour drive, which I dread the most.. Some buildings, scenery and route. God dammit scientist-tachi!! Go and create somekind of portal lar. *Shitting again..* Normally I don't say this in front of myself hehe but now that I have a reader.. Its a bit weird on how I should retain my normal self when write.
I am lost(in term of battle) and lost(in term of direction)..Dual-Lost.
Jaa ne
Sunday, July 13, 2008
13 JUL, SUN, 8:46PM
After the first, here comes the second.
The first time in my life, I feel changes. But I anticipate for what is coming, and I guess I can encounter it. Afterall its my life:)
These days have been quite meaningful for me, I have met one friend, Z. Z is one very special friend in my life, because I firmly believe, Z would greatly step into my life too haha. Your reading my blog eh!! So unfair!
And today a friend from Australia chat with me. She told me that she nearly killed someone by giving the man double dose of morphine. And eventually, nothing happens, everything was safe, but she resigned. I know not how serious the incident was to me, but to her, she was like so upset and scared. *sigh*
Yesterday, after talking to Z, I realised a lot of things, mostly about me and B. I really have no idea how to deal with this relationship. Flipping through our chat history, I am very sad. I think I did wrong mostly. But why those time I was so foolish to have said those words, used those tones and even raised the voice (yes, via chatting, and you definitely think that how to raise voice just by chatting with words ha).
Even at the present situation I am still searching for a meaning in my life. What would that be huh? Tell me..
The first time in my life, I feel changes. But I anticipate for what is coming, and I guess I can encounter it. Afterall its my life:)
These days have been quite meaningful for me, I have met one friend, Z. Z is one very special friend in my life, because I firmly believe, Z would greatly step into my life too haha. Your reading my blog eh!! So unfair!
And today a friend from Australia chat with me. She told me that she nearly killed someone by giving the man double dose of morphine. And eventually, nothing happens, everything was safe, but she resigned. I know not how serious the incident was to me, but to her, she was like so upset and scared. *sigh*
Yesterday, after talking to Z, I realised a lot of things, mostly about me and B. I really have no idea how to deal with this relationship. Flipping through our chat history, I am very sad. I think I did wrong mostly. But why those time I was so foolish to have said those words, used those tones and even raised the voice (yes, via chatting, and you definitely think that how to raise voice just by chatting with words ha).
Even at the present situation I am still searching for a meaning in my life. What would that be huh? Tell me..
Thursday, July 10, 2008
10 JUL, THU, 8:45PM
Actually I enjoy my life here in foreign land, though yes, I really am living by my alone-- Complete loneliness. And how many of you can really stand this kind of quietness?
Today I am getting a call from L again, which I was very happy. At least L does not forget about me! Hehe. And yesterday morning, I received a miss call on my mobile. I am curious that who would have called me? Hmm... Pondering. I never like riddle or mystery.
Shifting into new office system, I am a bit awkward. I know they have their reasons, but you see you cannot ignore my feeling. Some people are just stupid enough. *Sigh* Nothing to say. I will bet he never see the real world outside that's why he talks so arrogantly. But nevertheless, I should really keep up with the way people work. I have a bad feeling that, in time, I would be completely being wiped off from this place, either for the company's sake, or for my boss' sake. *Chuckle chuckle* I don't really feel sad lar.
While on my family part, I just recall I should grab some chances to go back and work in Miri. Mom misses me I know and so does daddy, well though, and frankly, I forget about them. Hey, but you just couldn't blame me on that. I am living by my own in my own world. For god's sake I am a special person-- I am the unique type *wakaka*
Today I talk too lot of rubbish. I don't even know the main point of my blog writing today. Maybe I just want to type and type and type, so that at least I am keeping a record of mu life for today.
I miss many of my friends, and amongst, him the most. I bet he wouldn't talk to me ever again. I know him so well. *sigh* A broken friendship, and this is the first time I encounter it in my life. B, you will be out of my life very soon:)
Till then, I wish everyone to have a happy day and live your life to the fullest. I know not why I am born, but I believe there must be a reason for it; I know not whether the path I am on is right, but I think in this matter, there is no right or wrong!
Thanks all and good night.
Today I am getting a call from L again, which I was very happy. At least L does not forget about me! Hehe. And yesterday morning, I received a miss call on my mobile. I am curious that who would have called me? Hmm... Pondering. I never like riddle or mystery.
Shifting into new office system, I am a bit awkward. I know they have their reasons, but you see you cannot ignore my feeling. Some people are just stupid enough. *Sigh* Nothing to say. I will bet he never see the real world outside that's why he talks so arrogantly. But nevertheless, I should really keep up with the way people work. I have a bad feeling that, in time, I would be completely being wiped off from this place, either for the company's sake, or for my boss' sake. *Chuckle chuckle* I don't really feel sad lar.
While on my family part, I just recall I should grab some chances to go back and work in Miri. Mom misses me I know and so does daddy, well though, and frankly, I forget about them. Hey, but you just couldn't blame me on that. I am living by my own in my own world. For god's sake I am a special person-- I am the unique type *wakaka*
Today I talk too lot of rubbish. I don't even know the main point of my blog writing today. Maybe I just want to type and type and type, so that at least I am keeping a record of mu life for today.
I miss many of my friends, and amongst, him the most. I bet he wouldn't talk to me ever again. I know him so well. *sigh* A broken friendship, and this is the first time I encounter it in my life. B, you will be out of my life very soon:)
Till then, I wish everyone to have a happy day and live your life to the fullest. I know not why I am born, but I believe there must be a reason for it; I know not whether the path I am on is right, but I think in this matter, there is no right or wrong!
Thanks all and good night.
10 JUL, THU, 11:47AM
The outcome of first meeting is as below.
Venue: Season Karaoke
Receipt
Haha.. interesting thing to put here, but today I am not in a good mood. Don't mess with me!
Venue: Season Karaoke
Receipt
06/07/2008 0:13 BILL NUMBER 2732
TABLE NO: 5 0001 CLERK0001
***PBAL RM0.00
1×7UP 6.00 RM6.00
6×CARLSBERG 9.00 RM54.00
1×HEINEKEN 9.00 RM9.00
SUBTOTAL RM60.00
10.00% SERVICE CHG RM6.00
-----------
ITEMS 7Q
14L ***TOTAL RM66.00
06/07/2008 0:14 BILL NUMBER 2732
TABLE NO: 5 0001 CLERK0001
***PBAL RM66.00
-----------
CASH RM100.00
CHANGE RM34.00
BALANCE RM0.00
Haha.. interesting thing to put here, but today I am not in a good mood. Don't mess with me!
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
9 JUL, WED, 8:29PM
I am a bit frustrated. Yesterday night I dreamed about some pictures again. And why I have to suffer so much!!
I really hate myself for being so. Shit! Today is another working day for me, which I have quite a lot to work on. And not really happy in the office as the Project Manager always upset my days. But then he is a good guy, just that I cannot stand the way he talks to me sometimes *sigh*
Today I am really feeling a bit bad mood, to tell the truth. And I should go home earlier today as, I still have some clothes to wash. Remember? Today is Wednesday!!
Jaa na!
I really hate myself for being so. Shit! Today is another working day for me, which I have quite a lot to work on. And not really happy in the office as the Project Manager always upset my days. But then he is a good guy, just that I cannot stand the way he talks to me sometimes *sigh*
Today I am really feeling a bit bad mood, to tell the truth. And I should go home earlier today as, I still have some clothes to wash. Remember? Today is Wednesday!!
Jaa na!
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
8 JUL, TUE, 8:45PM
从某个文章看到了这一句，这一句真的很有意思，所以今天就以这句跟大家共勉。
“站出来的人越多，我们的未来才会更有希望。”
从任何事情都把持着这个定律，“少数服从多数”以及“少数就是异类”。今天世上的种种，人们都还是如此想。譬如执政党与反对党、同性恋与异性恋、乞丐与富人、常人与天才，还有很多很多。其实公道地讲一句，不论是党派、性取向、身份、智慧等等，都不能以“因为是少数”所以被杯葛、看低、或被当成一类。
上帝赋予的“性”，凌驾于一切之上。这里说的“性”并非“性别的性”，而是那一点每个人身上都有的“道”，通称“灵性”，也因此有“性”的存在，而人才可以看、听、尝、触、感。也许很多人捉不着这一点但因为有“性”，故我们才有“七情六欲”。
想想，你不也觉得人是个很奥妙的存在吗？
为什么人会想？为什么人能感受？为什么伤心则哭泣开心则欢笑？
所以啊，只要具备这些就成为人，是人就是平等，平等有何来分别你我他？平等有何来分别残缺与健康？更不能说同性恋者是异类而异性恋者是正常的。
从任何事情都把持着这个定律，“少数服从多数”以及“少数就是异类”。今天世上的种种，人们都还是如此想。譬如执政党与反对党、同性恋与异性恋、乞丐与富人、常人与天才，还有很多很多。其实公道地讲一句，不论是党派、性取向、身份、智慧等等，都不能以“因为是少数”所以被杯葛、看低、或被当成一类。
上帝赋予的“性”，凌驾于一切之上。这里说的“性”并非“性别的性”，而是那一点每个人身上都有的“道”，通称“灵性”，也因此有“性”的存在，而人才可以看、听、尝、触、感。也许很多人捉不着这一点但因为有“性”，故我们才有“七情六欲”。
想想，你不也觉得人是个很奥妙的存在吗？
为什么人会想？为什么人能感受？为什么伤心则哭泣开心则欢笑？
所以啊，只要具备这些就成为人，是人就是平等，平等有何来分别你我他？平等有何来分别残缺与健康？更不能说同性恋者是异类而异性恋者是正常的。
Monday, July 7, 2008
7 JUL, MON, 6:16PM
我越做越没心了，自己在这里的日子，虽然有同伴的陪伴，但知人知面不知心，现在在一间公司中，我也只能相信一个人了，原来最后就只有他站在我的身边，真的很感谢他。
《心慌慌》-这首歌真的很好听
为什么没为什么
你在我脑海里那么深刻
影响我你影响我
连美味的巧克力的味道都变淡了
朋友说听朋友说
这些现象都算是正常的
没什么我没什么
只是觉得快要休克当你靠近了
心慌慌 手心在冒汗
我的坚强突然不坚强
夜慌慌 脸上在发烫
是不是你想念我的症状
我可以为你撒谎
为你变得漂亮
甚至可以陪你晒月亮
你不可对我撒谎
眼光在我身上
心事只准对我一个人讲
《心慌慌》-这首歌真的很好听
为什么没为什么
你在我脑海里那么深刻
影响我你影响我
连美味的巧克力的味道都变淡了
朋友说听朋友说
这些现象都算是正常的
没什么我没什么
只是觉得快要休克当你靠近了
心慌慌 手心在冒汗
我的坚强突然不坚强
夜慌慌 脸上在发烫
是不是你想念我的症状
我可以为你撒谎
为你变得漂亮
甚至可以陪你晒月亮
你不可对我撒谎
眼光在我身上
心事只准对我一个人讲
Sunday, July 6, 2008
6 JUL, SUN, 1:22PM
经过昨天，我觉得非常纳闷。
听了很多很多，也让我想了更多。我想，我俩都是来自不同的世界，太不可能有那个机会了。我一路坚强地走着我的人生路又是为了什么呢？到最后竟然发现会有这样的结果。
我，承受得了吗？
L跟我分享了L跟他的故事，点点滴滴，我惊察我没任何的容身之地，一切的一切的一切都跟他连贯上，那我在那一刻又是谁，在下一刻又是谁呢？
我渐渐地不明白了……
蓄意将我跟你的生活上的差别，以及作息生活的不同层次叙述，我真的撑不下去了。
这场战争，我未打先输，果然是必杀技。
听了很多很多，也让我想了更多。我想，我俩都是来自不同的世界，太不可能有那个机会了。我一路坚强地走着我的人生路又是为了什么呢？到最后竟然发现会有这样的结果。
我，承受得了吗？
L跟我分享了L跟他的故事，点点滴滴，我惊察我没任何的容身之地，一切的一切的一切都跟他连贯上，那我在那一刻又是谁，在下一刻又是谁呢？
我渐渐地不明白了……
蓄意将我跟你的生活上的差别，以及作息生活的不同层次叙述，我真的撑不下去了。
这场战争，我未打先输，果然是必杀技。
6 JUL, SUN, 1:33AM
Tonight I met with L, for the first time in my life..
Okay, I don't wanna talk much about L but just comment about the after-meeting feeling. I feel that.. we are coming from 2 totally different worlds. Too many obstacles.. too.. many.. I find it so hard if this relationship is gonna fruit. No.. so not likely.
Ha anyway, I made a good friend, who I can always look for when I am in trouble. I hope everything will be sunny once again.
Bah goodnight..
Okay, I don't wanna talk much about L but just comment about the after-meeting feeling. I feel that.. we are coming from 2 totally different worlds. Too many obstacles.. too.. many.. I find it so hard if this relationship is gonna fruit. No.. so not likely.
Ha anyway, I made a good friend, who I can always look for when I am in trouble. I hope everything will be sunny once again.
Bah goodnight..
Thursday, July 3, 2008
3 JUL, THU, 9:16PM
Going back in 15 min. But what I am happy the most is.. I am chatting again with L. L is very interesting, always have fresh topics to talk about.. and very warm. I hope this is not a mere imagination, nor a dream. I wish.. from this year onwards, my life would have a little change. Nope. It will be a big change. Perhaps the biggest..
古巨基的 《中箭》--非常贴切的表达我想说的……原来是这个滋味。
他恨下雨天 他酷爱古典乐
他沉默寡言 他时常逛书店
那一天他讲了 丘比特常失手 爱情太危险
他跟我约好了 让彼此自由一点
我开始想念 和他的每一天
聊了一整夜 说自己的从前
忽然在心理面 我隐约有一种 痛的感觉
也许是我 被他命中了 我心中的缺
我猜我是中了箭
才遇上他第七天
那一瞬间我有些晕眩
像全世界从此被偷走时间
我中了爱情的箭
很痛但是心很甜
我躲不开也不想避免
他没发现却在我身上应验
我中了一箭
我开始想念 和他的每一天
聊了一整夜 说自己的从前
忽然在心理面 我隐约有一种 痛的感觉
也许是我 被他命中了 我心中的缺
我猜我是中了箭
才遇上他第七天
那一瞬间我有些晕眩
像全世界从此被偷走时间
我中了爱情的箭
很痛但是心很甜
我躲不开也不想避免
他没发现却在我身上应验
我中了一箭
古巨基的 《中箭》--非常贴切的表达我想说的……原来是这个滋味。
他恨下雨天 他酷爱古典乐
他沉默寡言 他时常逛书店
那一天他讲了 丘比特常失手 爱情太危险
他跟我约好了 让彼此自由一点
我开始想念 和他的每一天
聊了一整夜 说自己的从前
忽然在心理面 我隐约有一种 痛的感觉
也许是我 被他命中了 我心中的缺
我猜我是中了箭
才遇上他第七天
那一瞬间我有些晕眩
像全世界从此被偷走时间
我中了爱情的箭
很痛但是心很甜
我躲不开也不想避免
他没发现却在我身上应验
我中了一箭
我开始想念 和他的每一天
聊了一整夜 说自己的从前
忽然在心理面 我隐约有一种 痛的感觉
也许是我 被他命中了 我心中的缺
我猜我是中了箭
才遇上他第七天
那一瞬间我有些晕眩
像全世界从此被偷走时间
我中了爱情的箭
很痛但是心很甜
我躲不开也不想避免
他没发现却在我身上应验
我中了一箭
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
2 JUL, WED, 5:58PM
So shockingly, yesterday somebody called me up in skype, and it was L.
We talked and we chatted till 9 something. Only one feeling aroused in me.. a sense of warmth and happiness.. I am in deep shit.. Maybe I have truly fallen for L.
What to do now.. Still pondering. I am just liking L on the internet.
We talked and we chatted till 9 something. Only one feeling aroused in me.. a sense of warmth and happiness.. I am in deep shit.. Maybe I have truly fallen for L.
What to do now.. Still pondering. I am just liking L on the internet.
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
1 JUL, TUE, 4:54PM
The company always like to organize seminar, because by this method, we can gather more potential customers in one snatch. But then, I am not that agree with this strategy. To hold a seminar, first and foremost, the objective has to be clear and pin-pointing. And, never expect people to say "Yes" in a seminar, particularly. Or "do you have any questions?" is also a stupid-enough question to tell the attendees-- Let me to be frank, people come just to listen. Its a seminar! Not a conference! I think some people they never know the meaning of seminar.
For me, I would say that a seminar is an event where we gather people, to introduce them a concept. Yes indeed, the initial meaning of this-morning seminar is right, but the latter part I wouldn't think it should evolve that way. Seminar should be easy, and have a pleasant feel. We definitely didn't do this.
Today L initiated a chat with me, which.. I am so happy about. But I am very scared.. Very scared to be.. hurt. L, would you be frank to me?
For me, I would say that a seminar is an event where we gather people, to introduce them a concept. Yes indeed, the initial meaning of this-morning seminar is right, but the latter part I wouldn't think it should evolve that way. Seminar should be easy, and have a pleasant feel. We definitely didn't do this.
Today L initiated a chat with me, which.. I am so happy about. But I am very scared.. Very scared to be.. hurt. L, would you be frank to me?
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